Do I Deserve It?

For quite sometime, my husband has been telling me to buy some stuff for myself. Like, I should buy new pairs of pants/jeans. Or new tops and new shoes, so that I use new stuff when I serve on stage.

Honestly, I think I have a lot of stuff, but some I don’t use because they no longer feel good and comfy. But then I don’t part with them because I still might be able to use them someday.

Anyway, so I bought a pair of sneakers around 2 weeks ago that costs four thousand bucks, which for me costs a lot already. And after paying for it using my hubby’s debit card, I got a little guilty, thinking that I could’ve bought something else.. I could’ve bought more with that money.

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So I asked my hubby if it was really okay for me to buy it. If I deserve it. And he validated it. That I could wear it with so many things. That I deserve buying new sneakers, after a post featuring a 12-year-old pair of sneakers that I can’t seem to part with.

The thing is, my hubby didn’t need to point out why I deserve it. Like, he didn’t acknowledge any hardwork I did as a wife and a mom, a part-time instructor, a servant of the Lord. He just told me, “it’s my gift.” 😊

I think this is also how we should view how God validates that we deserve what He gives us. Like, we shouldn’t really set the basis of a gift on what we did to deserve it. We should always look at the giver. At this instant, the giver was my hubby, and I know that he is one of God’s channels of love to me.

So, I guess the right question I should be asking, instead of “Do I deserve it?” is “How much loved am I?” 😊